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NursingHumor.com (homepage) Bedside Nursing Humor Cartoons and Comics (Nursing & Medical) Charge Nurse Jokes Clowning, Clowns, Therapeutic Humor & Comedy Links Dental Humor Emergency Department Jokes, ER Humor EMT, Paramedic Jokes, Prehospital Humor Geriatrics, Senior Citizen, Nursing Home Humor Labor and Delivery, Obstetrics Living With A Nurse, Nursing & Medical Jokes & Humor Medical Humor Medical Terminology More Like This . . . . NursingHumor.com (homepage) About Us Add URL Contact Us Gifts For Nurses Linking Policy Privacy Policy Search Our Sites Top Nursing Topics: A to Z Nursing Topics About Nursing: Certified Nursing Assistants, CNAs Disabled Nurses Impaired Nurses LPNs, LVNs Registered Nurses Advanced Practice Nurses Clinical Nurse Specialists Nurse Practitioners Ask The Nurse Associations (Nursing) Authors (Nursing) Boards of Nursing Burnout (Nursing) Businesses (Nurse-Owned) Brainteasers Care Plans (Nursing) Careers In Nursing Case Studies (Malpractice) CEUs (Nursing) Commonly Used Drugs Chat (Nursing) Clothes (Nursing) Colleges (Nursing) Current Events, Nursing News Degrees in Nursing Discussions (Nursing) Drugs (Commonly Used) Education (Nursing) Employment (Nursing) Entrepreneurs (Nurse) Equipment (Medical) Forensic Nursing Gifts For Nurses Going Shopping Health & Wellness Health Insurance Healthcare Unions, Nursing Unions, Organized Labor History of Nursing Hospitals, Medical Centers Informatics Nurses Intravenous (IV) & Infusion Therapy Jobs in Nursing Jokes (Nursing) Journals (Nursing) Long Term Care, Nursing Homes Male Nurses Malpractice Cases Medical Centers, Hospitals Medical Equipment Medical Humor, Nursing Jokes Men in Nursing Nurse Training Nurse Entrepreneurs Nursing Associations Nursing Authors Nursing Burnout Nursing Care Plans Nursing Careers Nursing (CEUs) Nursing Boards Nursing Clothes, Scrubs, Uniforms Nursing Colleges, Schools Nursing Degrees Nursing Discussions Nursing Education Nursing Employment Nursing Entrepreneurs Nursing Gifts Nursing Homes, Long Term Care Nursing Informatics Nursing Jobs Nursing Jokes, Medical Humor Nursing Journals Nursing History Nursing Malpractice Cases Nursing News Nursing Pay Nursing Programs Nursing Refresher Courses Nursing Research Nursing Resumes Nursing Salaries Nursing Scholarships Nursing Schools, Colleges Nursing Scrubs, Uniforms Nursing Shoes Nursing Shortage Nursing Stories Nursing Students Nursing Uniforms Nursing Unions, Organized Labor, Healthcare Unions Nursing Wages Paychecks (Nursing) Prescription Drug Indexes Puzzles, Quizzes Relocation Resources Refresher Courses Research (Nursing) Resumes (Nursing) Salaries (Nursing) Scholarships (Nursing) Schools of Nursing Scrubs, Nursing Uniforms Shoes (Nursing) Shopping (Going) on the Internet Shortage (Nursing) State Nursing Boards Student (Nursing) Training (Nursing) Traveling Nurses Uniforms, Scrubs, Nursing Unions (Nursing), Organized Labor, Healthcare Unions Wages (Nursing) Work At Home Opportunities

To subscribe, send a blank email to: nursingjokes-subscribe@topica.com ****************************************************** 10. Well, how 'bout that? I'm lost! Looks like we'll have to stop and ask directions. 9. You know Pumpkin, now that you're thirteen, you'll be ready for unchaperoned car dates. Won't that be fun? 8. I noticed that all your friends have a certain hostile attitude. I like that. 7. Here's a credit card and the key to my new car. GO CRAZY!! 6. What do you mean you wanna play football?? Figure skatings not good enough for you, son? 5. Your Mother and I are going away for the weekend. You might want to consider throwing a party. 4. Well, I don't know what's wrong with your car. Probably one of those doo-hickey thingies — ya know, that makes it run or something. Just have it towed to a mechanic and pay whatever he asks. 3. No son of mine is going to live under this roof without an earring. Now quit your bellyaching and let's go to the mall. 2. Whaddya wanna go and get a job for? I make plenty of money for you to spend. Here's $100. And the Number One thing you'll never hear a Dad say: 1. What do I want for Father's day? Aahh — don't worry about that. It's no big deal. (Well, he might say it, but he doesn't mean it!) ****************************************************** ****************************************************** Quick Parenting Jokes: My kids finished the first half of the school year with $485 in fundraising sales and seventeen relatives who no longer return our calls. The Circumcision, Medical Jokes, Kids Humor: http://www.nursinghumor.com/circumcision ****************************************************** It's Mighty Dark In Here, Infidelity Jokes, Parenting Humor: http://www.nursinghumor.com/here/ ****************************************************** Drawing God, Out of The Mouth's of Babes Jokes, Parenting Humor: http://www.nursinghumor.com/drawing ****************************************************** Stern Sibling, Labor & Delivery Jokes, Sibling Humor:"An old county doctor went way out to the boondocks to deliver a baby. It was so far out that there was no electricity. When the doctor arrived, no one was home except for the laboring mother and her five-year-old child." http://www.nursinghumor.com/stern ****************************************************** Condom Use, Parenting Jokes, Marriage Humor: http://www.nursinghumor.com/use ****************************************************** A Dark and Stormy Night, Parenting Jokes, Childrens Humor: http://www.nursinghumor.com/stormy ****************************************************** Big Words, Children's Jokes, Medical Humor: http://www.nursinghumor.com/words ****************************************************** The 8 Simple Rules for Dating My Daughter: http://www.nursinghumor.com/simple ****************************************************** Having Your First, Second, Third Child, Parenting Jokes, Motherhood Humor: http://www.nursinghumor.com/having ****************************************************** Where Did It Go? Parenting Jokes, Children's Humor: http://www.nursinghumor.com/where ****************************************************** Top Ten Signs That You Might Be A Frustrated Mom: http://www.nursinghumor.com/frustrated ****************************************************** Just Like Mom, Parenting Jokes, Relationship Humor: http://www.nursinghumor.com/just ****************************************************** The Patient Mother, Parenting Jokes, Kids Humor: http://www.nursinghumor.com/patient ****************************************************** Special Occasions, Parenting Jokes, Children's Humor: http://www.nursinghumor.com/special ****************************************************** Coming Prepared, Pharmacist Jokes, Parenting Humor: http://www.nursinghumor.com/prepared ****************************************************** Answers To Fifth Grade Science Exams, Children's Jokes, Parenting Humor: http://www.nursinghumor.com/answers ****************************************************** Little Johnny Does Math, Childrens Jokes, Parenting Humor: http://www.nursinghumor.com/humor/parents.parenting.jokes.about.children.kids.little.johnny.does.math.htm ****************************************************** A Grandmother's Insomnia, Doctor's Jokes, Pregnancy & Medications Humor http://www.nursinghumor.com/insomnia ****************************************************** The Adopted, Parenting Jokes, Adoption Humor http://www.nursinghumor.com/adopted ****************************************************** Generation Gap, Battle of The Sexes Jokes, Parenting Humor http://www.nursinghumor.com/humor/parenting.parents.jokes.generation.gap.htm ****************************************************** Mom's Dictionary, Kids Jokes, Parenting Humor http://www.nursinghumor.com/humor/parenting.parents.jokes.moms.dictionary.htm ****************************************************** Property Laws According To Kids, Childrens Jokes, Parenting Humor http://www.nursinghumor.com/humor/parenting.parents.childrens.jokes.property.laws.according.to.kids.htm ****************************************************** Things My Mother Taught Me, Parenting Jokes, Motherhood Humor http://www.nursinghumor.com/humor/parenting.parents.jokes.things.my.mother.taught.me.htm ****************************************************** You Might Be A Mom If . . ., Parenting Jokes, Motherhood Humor http://www.nursinghumor.com/mom ****************************************************** New & Improved, Parenting Jokes, Children's Humor: http://www.nursinghumor.com/improved ****************************************************** ****************************************************** ****************************************************** Nursing Topics, A to Z: A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, K L, M, N, O, P, R, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y, Z If your website is not listed here, we encourage you to submit it: Add Your Website/URL. See also: Nursing Degrees, LPN-RN, RN-BSN, RN-MSN, Online/Offline College, University and more!:"Higher income. Career mobility. Now, no matter where you live or what your schedule, you can earn your Associate or Bachelor Degree to take your professional life to the next level — without putting the rest of your life on hold!" If you do any Browsing or Windowshopping online, please visit our online Mall: http://www.nursefriendly.com/shopping/ Gifts For Nurses: http://www.nursefriendly.com/gifts/ 4nursinguniforms.com:"Choose from Top Nursing Uniform Companies. All sizes, styles and popular name brands available. Large selection of accessories as well: Accessories Blood Pressure Cuffs, Sphygnomanometers Nursing Tote Bags, Carry-Ons, Medical Bags Clinical, Medical Supplies, Nurses Discount Outlet: Angels, Books, Clothing , Equipment, Figurines, Holidays, Home Decor, Jewelry, Nurses, Office Decor, Scrubs, Shoes, T-Shirts Footwear, Shoes, Sandals, Discount, Bargains Gifts For Nurses (Nurses Week) Hosiery, Socks, Stockings Hats, Jackets, Jumpers Jewelry, Earrings, Necklaces, Watches Luxury Spas, Facials, Manicures, Pedicures Perfumes, Fragrances, Phermones Shoes, Boots, Sandals, Footwear, High Heels, Slippers Stethescopes, Nurse Kits, Replacement Parts Swimwear (Tan-Through) Women's Lingerie " 4nursinguniforms.com Nurses' Station:"The idea for the Nurses' Station Catalog was conceived in 1989. After searching the marketplace in response to customer inquiries, it became obvious that there were no catalogs of this type serving the nursing profession. To be sure, there were several catalogs offering nurse's uniforms and a smattering of professional items. But there weren't any catalogs at the time offering a range of gifts, clothing, professional items, name badges, shoes and scrubs for nurses. It took two years of hard work to gather samples and put a together a catalog of the most unique and high-quality items for nurses." Nurses Station P.O. Box 388 Centerbrook, CT 06409-03881 http://www.nursefriendly.com/station/ Choose Nursing Uniforms, Shoes, Scrubs, Accessories By Brand: Accessories Nursing Carry-Ons, Medical Bags, Clinical, Medical Supplies, Footwear, Shoes, Sandals, Discount, Bargains Gifts For Nurses (Nurses Week) Hats, Jackets, Jumpers Jewelry, Earrings, Necklaces, Watches Luxury Spas, Facials, Manicures, Pedicures Perfumes, Fragrances, Phermones Shoes, Boots, Sandals, Footwear, High Heels, Slippers Stethescopes, Nurse Kits, Replacement Parts Swimwear (Tan-Through) Women's Lingerie Nursing In The Media, truthaboutnursing.org ER:"Media products under your influence, particularly the NBC/Warner drama "ER," are harming the profession of 2.7 million American nurses by giving the public an inaccurate and inadequate account of what nurses really do to save and improve lives. Research suggests that "ER" strongly and negatively influences the way children view nursing. These products contribute to the nursing shortage, a public health crisis that threatens millions worldwide." http://www.truthaboutnursing.org/letters/er/ House, MD:"The main patient in tonight's episode of Fox's House was a nurse who believed that a cat tended to sit with those who were about to die--including, recently, the nurse herself. That may not sound like a promising vehicle for House to improve its abysmal portrayal of nursing. But the show actually presents the nurse as someone with health knowledge. And her search for meaning in faith, for some reason in tragic events, is a real counterpoint to House's cold rationality. Indeed, despite the obvious potential for mockery in the cat angle, the mighty House treats the nurse with considerable respect--he seems to care what she thinks, or at least to find her views unnerving. Of course, the nurse plays no real clinical role in the episode, and no other nurses do either. So the episode suggests, as usual, that physicians provide all important care in hospital settings, including all meaningful psychosocial and physical care. Still, any suggestion that intelligent life resides in a nurse is a welcome departure for House (and for the episode's writer Peter Blake, who also penned a November 2005 House episode that was notable for its physician glorification and its casual contempt for other health professions). Tonight's episode, "Here Kitty," drew 13.1 million U.S. viewers. more... see the relevant film clips... and please join our letter writing campaign!" http://www.truthaboutnursing.org/letters/house/ Private Practice:"ABC's Private Practice, whose season ends tomorrow, April 30, may be the only broadcast network show with a major nurse character to return next season. In the February 5 episode (Mike Ostrowski's "Acceptance," 13 million U.S. viewers), lone nurse character Dell Parker, who is studying to be a midwife, shows some tentative clinical aptitude and knowledge to go with his boyish eagerness. Under the close supervision of OB/GYN Addison Montgomery, Dell ably performs a vacuum-assisted delivery. Later he haltingly guides the baby's parents toward breastfeeding. Dell also performs an assured solo ultrasound of pregnant psychiatrist Violet Turner, calming her panic attack and eliciting her agreement to his own suggestion that, though he's "not a doctor," he will likely become a "pretty good midwife." The show still condescends to Dell, who is also the office manager/receptionist at the LA clinic where the show is set. In the March 26 episode (Craig Turk's "Do the Right Thing," 10.1 million U.S. viewers)," http://www.truthaboutnursing.org/letters/pp/ "Scrubs" defines nursing:""Scrubs" defines nursing: it's all about shutting up and following physician "orders. " Tonight's episode of NBC's "Scrubs," which purports to teach nurse Carla Espinosa that nursing is all about doing what physicians tell you, is one of the most virulently anti-nurse prime time television episodes the Center has ever seen. more..." http://www.truthaboutnursing.org/news/2009/may/06_scrubs.html To subscribe to our: Nurse Friendly Notes Newsletter: Send a blank e-mail to: nursefriendlynotes-subscribe@topica.com http://www.nursefriendly.com Nursing Jokes, Medical Humor, Jokes to make you laugh and smile all day. Send a blank email to: nursingjokes-subscribe@topica.com http://lists.topica.com/lists/nursingjokes/ Clinical Nursing Cases: Send a blank message to: clinicalnursingcases-subscribe@topica.com http://www.nursingcasestudy.com Inspirational Stories: Send a blank e-mail to: inspirationalstories-subscribe@topica.com http://www.inspirationalnursing.com Nursing Chat, Nurse Discussion Forums: http://nursingdiscussions.com Alphabetical Nursing Topic Discussion, Chat List Are good CNA jobs that hard to find? Being A Male Nurse Curtailing Workplace Gossip Dealing With Confrontation In Nursing Degree Vs Diploma EKG Classes First Year On The Floor Horror Stories -- working short staffed How Many Hours A Week Do You Work Impaired Nurses Liability Question for Experienced Nurses LPN vs. RN vs. BSN, etc... Male Nurses Mandatory BSN to practice nursing being considered Mean Age of RNs Military Nursing More Foreign Nurses, Is It A Plot? Nurse Entrepreneurs Nurses Aides, Can't Live With Them. . . Nurses In Recovery: Nursing & Adult ADD Put Male Nurses In Panties Rude Doctors Specialty Nursing Staff Nurses Tattoos In The Workplace The Nursing Shortage, Your Opinions To Stay In Nursing or Not Travel Nurses Talk Travel Nursing Workplace Violence, Horizontal Violence Against Nurses ****************************************************** Commonly (Frequently) Used Drugs Medication Indexes: http://www.prescriptionforviagra.com Ace Inhibitors (Hypertension) AIDS/HIV Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome, Human Immunodficiency Virus, Antiviral Agents Anti Angiogenesis (Chemotherapy) Antibiotics Allergy Relief, Antihistamines, Decongestants, Sinus Congestion, Runny Nose, Prescription Drugs, Medications Anti-Coagulants, Blood Thinners Anti-depressants Anxiety Medications Appetite Enhancers, Appetite Stimulants, Appetite Stimulation Antibiotics Anticoagulants, Blood Thinners, Drug Therapy Antiviral Agents, HIV, AIDS, Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome, Human Immunodficiency Virus Appetite Control, Obesity, Weight Loss, Diet Pills Appetite Supressants, Diet Pills, Weight Loss, Weight Control Barbiturates, Hypnotics, Sedatives Benzodiazepines Birth Control Pills, Contraception, Drug & Medication Indexes Blood Thinners, Anticoagulants, Drug Therapy Calcium channel blockers Chemo, Antineoplastics, Chemotherapy, Anticancer, Oncology, Prescription Drugs, Medications Cardiac, Coronary, Heart Drugs, Medications Cholesterol Lowering Drugs, Anti Hyper Lipidemics, Prescription Drugs, Medications Contraception, Birth Control Pills, Drug & Medication Indexes Controlled Substances, Narcotic Analgesics, Opiates, Opioids, Convulsions, Convulsants, Epilepsy, Epileptics, Seizures Diet Pills, Weight Loss, Obesity, Appetite Control Fluoroquinolones (Antibiotics) Gastrointestinal, GI, Ulcers, Heartburn, GERD, Indigestion Prevention Prescription Drugs, Medications Hair Loss, Mens Health, Impotence, Obesity, Smoking Cessation Hypnotics, Sedatives, Barbiturates Impotence, Hair Loss, Mens Health, Obesity, Smoking Cessation Laxatives, Physic, Cathartics Mens Health, Hair Loss, Impotence, Obesity, Smoking Cessation Muscle Relaxants, Centrally Acting Narcotic Analgesics, Controlled Substances, Opiates, Opioids, Nonsteroidal Anti-Inflammatories, NSAIDS Obesity, Weight Loss, Appetite Control, Diet Pills Opiates, Opioids, Controlled Substances, Narcotic Analgesics Over The Counter (OTC) Medications Pain Killers Sedatives, Hypnotics, Barbiturates Skeletal Muscle Relaxants, Centrally Acting Steroids, Anabolic, Corticosteroids, Prednisone Smoking Cessation, Impotence, Hair Loss, Mens Health, Obesity Respiratory (Asthma, COPD, Emphysema, Pulmonary) Weight Gain Weight Loss, Obesity, Appetite Control, Diet Pills ****************************************************** ****************************************************** The Uniform Resource Locator (URL) or Internet Street Address of this page is http://www.nursinghumor.com/humor/parenting.parents.jokes.about.children.top.ten.things.youll.never.hear.a.dad.say.htm Last updated by Andrew Lopez, RN on Monday, January 25, 2010 This Page is Part of The Nursefriendly National Nursing A To Z & Consumer Health Directories We are Incorporated in The State of New Jersey, under the name: Nursefriendly, Inc. 38 Tattersall Drive, Mantua, New Jersey (NJ) 08051 Our Phone #: 856-415-9617 This website Is © Copyright 1997 - 2010, Andrew Lopez, RN, Nursefriendly, Inc. Please contact us for permission to reproduce. Other products and companies referred to herein are trademarks or registered trademarks of their respective companies or mark holders, and are not owned or affiliated with Nursefriendly, Inc. or any of it's affiliated companies. View My Stats