To subscribe, send a blank email to: nursingjokes-subscribe@topica.com
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An elderly woman went to the doctor for a check up.
After examining her and checking her cardiovascular activity, the doctor recommended that she engage in sexual activity three times a week.
Embarrassed, the woman asked the doctor to tell her husband.
The doctor went out into the waiting room and told the husband that his wife needed sex three times a week.
The elderly husband replied, "OK, Doc. Which days?
"Monday, Wednesday and Friday would be ideal," replied the doctor.
"Well, I can bring her on Monday and Wednesday," the husband said, "but on Fridays, she'll have to take a taxi."
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Patient: Doctor, I think I need glasses.
Teller: You certainly do! This is a bank.
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A man walks into a Doctors. He has a cucumber up his nose, a carrot in his left ear and a banana in his right ear.
"What's the matter with me?" he asked.
"You're not eating properly." replied the Doctor.
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"Doctor, I've had problems with silent gas emissions. At home, work, or at church I get lots of silent gas emissions. As a matter of fact I've had three sitting here talking to you. What are we going to do?"
"The first thing we're going to do is check your hearing"
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A man goes to doctor and says:
'Doctor, I have a problem. When I drink tea, my eye aches(sp?) and when I stop, it stops too. Can you help me?'
Doctor says:'Take the spoon out of the cup!'
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"Doctor, Doctor, You've got to help me - I just can't stop my hands from shaking!"
"Do you drink a lot?"
"Not really - I spill most of it.
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What's the best thing about having Alzheimer's Disease?
You can hide your own Easter eggs.******************************************************
Excess Weight, Medical Jokes, Obesity Humor :"Well, Jonathan, what are you going to do about the excess weight you're carrying around," the doctor asked."http://www.nursinghumor.com/weight
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Eating Ants, Emergency Room Jokes, Medical Humor :"A medical student was doing a rotation in toxicology at the poison control center. One day, this woman called in very upset because she caught her little daughter eating ants."http://www.nursinghumor.com/ants
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Overdue Appointment, Medical Jokes, Patient Humor :http://www.nursinghumor.com/overdue
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The Right Size, Medical Jokes, Surgical Humor :"John was successful in his career, but as he got older he was increasingly hampered at work by terrible headaches."http://www.nursinghumor.com/size
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Exam Professionalism, Medical Jokes, Doctor's Humor :"A beautiful, voluptuous woman goes to a gynecologist. The doctor takes one look at this woman and all his professionalism goes out the window."http://www.nursinghumor.com/exam
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Top Ten Signs You Need A New Doctor, Medical Jokes, Top Ten Humor :"- He calls you at two in the morning "just to talk." Instead of rubber surgical gloves he wears oven mitts."http://www.nursinghumor.com/need
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Taking As Directed, Medical Jokes, Doctor Humor :http://www.nursinghumor.com/directed
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Christmas Carols for the Psychiatrically Challenged :http://www.nursinghumor.com/carols
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Too Late, Doctors Jokes, Gallows Humor :"The orthopedic surgeon I work for was moving to a new office, and his staff was helping transport many of the items."http://www.nursinghumor.com/late
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The Circumcision, Medical Jokes, Kids Humor :http://www.nursinghumor.com/circumcision
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Able To Play? Operating Room Jokes, Medical Humor :"A doctor has come to see one of his patients in a hospital. The patient has had major surgery to both of his hands."http://www.nursinghumor.com/play
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Feeling Exhausted, Medical Jokes, Patient Humor :http://www.nursinghumor.com/exhausted
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Getting Even, Nursing Jokes, Physician Humor :http://www.nursinghumor.com/getting/
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How Long? Emergency Department Jokes, Medical Humor :http://www.nursinghumor.com/how
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Virtually Deaf? Getting Older Jokes, Medical Humor :"An elderly gentleman finally invested in a hearing aid after becoming virtually deaf. It was one of those invisible hearing aids. Soon after, he went for a check-up."http://www.nursinghumor.com/deaf
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She Didn't Make It, Medical Jokes, Emergency Humor :http://www.nursinghumor.com/it
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New Secretary, Doctor's Jokes, Battle of The Sexes Humor :"Dr. Johnson got himself a new secretary. She was young, sweet, and very polite. One day while taking dictation, she noticed his fly was open."http://www.nursinghumor.com/secretary
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Auto Enthusiast, Surgeon Jokes, Medical Humor :http://www.nursinghumor.com/auto
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Blind Drunk, Emergency Department Jokes, Medical Humor :http://www.nursinghumor.com/drunk
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Stern Sibling, Labor & Delivery Jokes, Sibling Humor :http://www.nursinghumor.com/stern
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Last Words, Doctor Jokes, Priest Humor :http://www.nursinghumor.com/last
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Quick Diagnosis, Doctor Jokes, Physician Humor :http://www.nursinghumor.com/diagnosis
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Come Quick! Medical Jokes, Marriage Humor :http://www.nursinghumor.com/quick
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Taking Notes, Doctor Jokes, Getting Older Humor :http://www.nursinghumor.com/notes
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Fine Art, Medical Jokes, Gallows Humor :http://www.nursinghumor.com/art
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Healthcare Dollars, Medical Jokes, Healthcare Humor :"In reviewing how our healthcare dollars are spent, the following statistics were revealed."http://www.nursinghumor.com/dollars
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Medical Bloopers Found In Patient Charts, Doctor Jokes, Medical Humor :http://www.nursinghumor.com/bloopers
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Skin Graft, Medical Jokes, Marriage Humor :"A married couple were in a terrible accident in which the woman's face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn't graft any skin from her body because she was too thin. So the husband offered to donate some of his own skin. However, the only skin on his body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from his buttocks."http://www.nursinghumor.com/graft
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Big Words, Children's Jokes, Medical Humor :http://www.nursinghumor.com/words
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Small, Medium or Large? Doctor Jokes, Marriage Humor :http://www.nursinghumor.com/medium
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Bad News, Worse News, Medical Jokes, Geriatric Humor http://www.nursinghumor.com/news
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A Future Physician, Medical Jokes, Parenting Humor :http://www.nursinghumor.com/future
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Obsessions, Psychiatric Jokes, Medical Humor :"A psychiatrist was conducting a group therapy session with four young mothers and their small children. You all have obsessions," he observed."http://www.nursinghumor.com/obsessions
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Sun Burn Treatment, Medical Jokes, Patient Care Humor :http://www.nursinghumor.com/sun
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The Good News, The Bad News, Medical Jokes, Doctor Humor :http://www.nursinghumor.com/good/
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Isolation Precautions, Infection Control Jokes, Physician Humor :http://www.nursinghumor.com/isolation
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Not Good Looking, Medical Jokes, Marriage Humor :http://www.nursinghumor.com/looking
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Practical Jokes, Bedside Nursing Humor, Doctor Jokes http://www.nursinghumor.com/practical
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This Won't Hurt Much, Medical Jokes, Military Humor :http://www.nursinghumor.com/much
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Common Forms of Office Illness, On The Job Jokes, Medical Humor, http://www.nursinghumor.com/illness
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Coffee and Viagra, Medical Jokes, Marriage Humor :http://www.nursinghumor.com/viagra
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Rusty Tools, Viagra Jokes, Marriage Humor :http://www.4nursing.com/humor-bedside-nursing-jokes-viagra-marriage-rusty-tools.html
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Top Ten Things You Don't Want To Hear When Regaining Consciousness, Medical Jokes, Operating Room Humor :http://www.nursinghumor.com/regaining
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Working In The Dark, Psychiatric Jokes, Medical Humor :http://www.nursinghumor.com/dark
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The Business Trip, Medical Jokes, Patient Humor http://www.4nursing.com/humor-medical-doctor-patient-jokes-business-trip.html
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Sex Therapy, Medical Jokes, Patient Humor :https://nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/medical.doctor.physician.patient.jokes.sex.therapy.htm
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Post-Op Blues, Medical Jokes, Anesthesiology Humor :https://nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/medical.doctor.physician.patient.jokes.post.op.blues.htm
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A Star In The East, Medical Jokes, Physician Humor :https://nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/medical.doctor.physician.patient.jokes.a.star.in.the.east.htm
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The Forgetful Patient, Doctors Jokes, Medical Humor :https://nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/the.forgetful.patient.htm
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Diving Right In, Psychiatric Jokes, Medical Humor :https://nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/psychiatric.jokes.nursing.humor.diving.right.in.htm
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Doctor's Funeral, Medical Jokes, Physician Humor :https://nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/medical.doctor.physician.patient.jokes.doctors.funeral.htm
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Buying Condoms, Pharmacy Jokes, Infidelity Humor :http://www.nursinghumor.com/condoms
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Odds & Ends, Medical Jokes, Physician Humor :https://nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/medical.doctor.physician.patient.jokes.odds.and.ends.htm
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Heart Transplant, Organ Donation Jokes, Medical Humor :https://nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/medical.doctor.physician.patient.jokes.heart.transplant.htm
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Passing Wind, Medical Jokes, Patient Humor :https://nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/medical.doctor.physician.patient.jokes.passing.wind.htm
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Removing Patches, Medications Jokes, Pharmacy Humor :https://nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/medical.doctor.physician.patient.jokes.removing.patches.htm
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Top Ten Reasons For Becoming An Anesthesiologist, Medical Jokes, Hospital Humor :http://www.nursinghumor.com/anesthesiologist
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Screwed Up Laboratory Results, Medical Jokes, Laboratory Humor :https://nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/screwed.up.laboratory.results.htm
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Taxonomy of Medical Professionals, Medical Jokes, Hospital Humor :https://nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/medical.doctor.physician.patient.jokes.taxonomy.of.medical.professionals.htm
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The Center of Attention, Medical Jokes, Patient Humor :https://nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/medical.doctor.physician.patient.jokes.the.center.of.attention.htm
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Approving The New Hospital Policy, Medical Jokes, Physician Humor :https://nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/medical.doctor.physician.patient.jokes.approving.the.new.hospital.policy.htm
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Patient Confidentiality, Medical Jokes, Patient Humor :https://nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/medical.doctor.physician.patient.jokes.patient.confidentiality.htm
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Five Benefits of Mothers Milk, Breastfeeding Jokes, Medical Humor :https://nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/medical.doctor.physician.patient.jokes.five.benefits.of.mothers.milk.htm
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Arkansas Medical Definitions , Medical Terminology Jokes, Redneck Humorhttp://www.nursinghumor.com/
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Anyone Need A Doctor? Medical Jokes, First Aid Humor http://www.nursinghumor.com/medical
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A Cure For One Man's Cough, Medical Jokes, Drug & Pharmacy Humor http://www.nursinghumor.com/medical/
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Ambulances As Medical Necessities , Medical Jokes, Patient Humorhttp://www.nursinghumor.com/ambulances
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Viagra Variations , Drug & Medications Jokes, Prescription Medicine Humorhttps://nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/drugs.prescriptions.medications.medicines.viagra.variations.htm
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A Grandmother's Insomnia , Doctor's Jokes, Pregnancy & Medications Humorhttp://www.nursinghumor.com/insomnia
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Shooting Blanks , Medical Jokes, Physician Humorhttps://nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/medical.doctor.physician.patient.jokes.shooting.blanks.htm
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I Think My Wife Is Going Deaf , Medical Jokes, Marriage Humor
https://nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/medical.jokes.humor.my.wife.is.going.deaf.htm
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A Doctor, A Nurse And A Shredder , Nursing Jokes, Medical Humorhttps://nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/medical.jokes.humor.a.doctor.a.nurse.and.a.shredder.htm
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He Thinks He's A Surgeon , Medical Jokes, Pearly Gates Humorhttps://nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/medical.doctor.physician.patient.jokes.he.thinks.he.is.a.surgeon.htm
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Near Death Experience , Medical Jokes , Gallows Humorhttps://nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/medical/near.death.experiences.plastic.surgeries.htm
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The Aspirin And The Job Interview , Medical Jokes , On The Job Humorhttps://nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/medical.jokes.humor.the.aspirin.and.the.interview.htm
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A Work of Art , Medical Jokes, Patient Humorhttps://nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/medical/a.work.of.art.htm
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Multiple Specimens, Medical Jokes, Doctor & Patient Humor https://nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/medical.doctor.physician.patient.jokes.multiple.specimens.htm
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Perfect Shape Considering Your Age , Medical Jokes, Physician Humorhttps://nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/medical.perfect.shape.considering.your.age.htm
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Six Months To Live , Medical Jokes, Physician Humorhttps://nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/medical/six.months.to.live.htm
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It Hurts All Over, Medical Jokes, Physician Humor http://nursinghumor.com/hurts
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Actual Medical Quotes From Patient Charts, Medical Jokes, Physican Humor https://nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/medical/actual.medical.quotes.from.charts.htm
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First Proctology Exam, Medical Humor, Doctors Jokes https://nursefriendly.com/nursing/humor/medical/first.proctology.exam.htm
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A Short History Of Medicine, Medical Jokes, Physician Humor http://www.nursinghumor.com/medical/a.short.history.of.medicine.htm
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Anyone For Pasta, Medical Jokes, Marriage & Infidelity Humor
http://www.nursinghumor.com/pasta
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Professional Courtesy, Medical Jokes, Physician Humor
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The Difference Between Doctors & Veterinarians, Medical Jokes, Veterinary Humor
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Dehydration, Medical Jokes, Physican Humor
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Making It Look Easy, Doctor Jokes, Medical Humor.
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Breastfeeding Technical Support, Medical Jokes, Obstetrics Humor http://www.nursinghumor.com/medical/breastfeeding.technical.support.htm
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The Doctor's Visit, Medical Jokes, Physician Humor :http://www.nursinghumor.com/doctors
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Screening Medical Students
http://www.nursinghumor.com/medical/screening.medical.students.htm
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A Cure For One Man's Stuttering :
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My Elbow Hurts!
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Five Doctors Go Duck Hunting
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Do You Have A Dentist Appointment Tomorrow Too?
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Who Makes the Best Patient?
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Eye Surgery, Operating Room Jokes, Medical Humor :http://www.nursinghumor.com/eye
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GDU College of Medical Fraud :"GDU refuses to offer a degree in medicine out of concern that some cost-conscious hospital will hire someone with one of our diplomas, and let them perform surgery. However,GDU does offer programs in medically-related fields"
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Medical Humor :
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See also:
Animals
Therapeutic Humor Associations
Attorney & Lawyer, Legal Jokes, Law Humor
Bar
Battle of the Sexes
Bill Clinton Humor, Presidential Jokes
Bedside Nursing Humor
Blonde Jokes, Blond Humor
Brain Teasers
Cartoons and Comics (Nursing & Medical)
Changing A Light Bulb Jokes
Charge Nurse Jokes
Clowning, Clowns, Therapeutic Humor & Comedy Links
Dental Humor
Died and Gone To Heaven, Religious Jokes, Priest & Nun Humor
Divorce Jokes, Ending A Marriage Humor
Emergency Department Jokes, ER Humor
Gallows Humor
General Nursing Humor
Geriatrics, Senior Citizen, Nursing Home Humor
Greeting Cards
Growing Old Jokes
Health Maintenance Organization (HMO) or Managed Care Humor
Inspiration
Joke Mailing Lists
Labor and Delivery, Obstetrics
Law Enforcement Humor, Police Jokes
Lawyer, Attorney & Legal Jokes, Law Humor
Legal Jokes, Attorney & Lawyer, Law Humor
Living With A Nurse, Nursing & Medical Jokes & Humor
Marriage, Matrimony, Wedding
Medical Humor
Medical Terminology Merry Christmas, X-mas Jokes
Nursing Cartoons and Comics
Nursing Humor Entrepreneurs
Operating Room Humor
Parenting Humor, Jokes About Parents And Children
Pets, Veterinarians
Priest & Nun Humor, Died and Gone To Heaven, Religious Jokes
Psychiatric
Religious Jokes, Priest & Nun Humor, Died and Gone To Heaven
RN, Nurse Jokes, Nursing Humor
School Nursing Jokes, Nursing Student Humor
Speakers Bureaus
Top Ten Reasons Jokes & Humor
Veterinarian Jokes, Pet Humor
Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road Jokes
You Might Be A . . . . If "
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Nursing Jokes, Medical Humor, Jokes to make you laugh and smile all day.
Send a blank email to: nursingjokes-subscribe@topica.com http://www.nursinghumor.com
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The Uniform Resource Locator (URL) or Internet Street Address
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Last updated by Andrew
Lopez, RN on March 13, 2023
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